Every now and again I enter those 'phases' where I am learning something over and over in my life. I'm not talking about math factoring using the FOIL (first, outside, inside, last) method or carbon-carbon bonding. I am speaking of things learned from this journey we call life. (that sounded really cheesy).
Anyway, I recently auditioned and booked my first PAYING gig as an actor (kinda). I submitted myself, as I do daily to numerous projects, for a Three-6 Mafia video about a week ago. I got an e-mail saying they wanted me to audition. I went on a Sunday and memorized the chorus of the song and, per their request, rapped it into a "mirror" (camera) while
pimpin' and
primpin' as if going out to a club or something. I pretty much do that on a daily basis so...I nailed it. I felt good about it, again--as I do normally after auditions and often DON'T get a call back. They did, however, call me and say they wanted to book me on the music video. I was super excited. They said, "bring 2 pairs of casual clothes to wear while standing outside the club then we'll put you in a rap outfit to rap during the video." I did my best not to be too excited in case something didn't happen. Out here, you don't know till you
know. So I brought my clothes and after sitting around for about 5 hours then moved to a new location to wait another 2 hours then have all 17 people stand in a line for a shoot then dismiss us, I was
disappointed--really
disappointed.
So as par for the course I had been prepared through a great sermon at church the previous Sunday and with what I've been reading as of late during my quiet times.
Psalm 25:1"To you, O Lord, I lift up my soul. O my God, in you I trust; let me not be put to shame (for trusting in you)..."
1Corinthians 6:19b,20"You are not your own, for you were bought with a price."
James 4: 13"Come now, you who say, 'Today or tomorrow we will go into such and such a town and spend a year there and trade and make a profit'--yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring......Instead you ought to say, "if the Lord wills, we will live and do this or that."
In church (Pacific Crossroads) last week our pastor spoke about this last passage. It was a great check to my perspective in this industry and as a Christian in general. Pastor Rankin Wilburn called this tendency to want to control our lives "practical atheism." By this he meant it is practicing a distrust of God. He was quick to say that making plans and goals, etc. are not in the least bit wrong. However, worrying, envying and making plans without factoring in God--according to James 4--is sin.
Hmm...that is very interesting.
He quoted a guy (who I'll have to e-mail to get the name) who asked, "Do I believe God's plans for me are better than my plans for me?" This wise of a statement must be somewhere in Proverbs or something, undoubtedly phrased different unless in the Message Remix Bible. None-the-less I like this question.
In
Los Angeles, CA, can I trust that God's plans for me are better than the plans I have? For me a shift in mentality is necessary in this industry to avoid going crazy and (all
apologies to
Eminem) losing myself.
Allowing God to take control is more than a crazy country song about Jesus taking the wheel...and yet there is something so simple about that mental picture.
Hmm. I wonder what Jesus would be driving?
Those are my thoughts and what I'm learning.
much love
Well, I have a friend who works for a marketing research company who makes money by getting sample audiences to movies that haven't come out yet. This past Thursday night I went to Blades of Glory. It's the story of Jon Heder (Napoleon Dynamite) and Will Ferrell (duh) who are male figure skaters who must join forces and compete for gold as they challenge seasoned veterans Will Arnet and Amy Poehler. It was classic Ferrell with great one-liners and some really funny interaction/bantering with Jon Heder.
